The Sounds of Paradise

The gray, dreary days of February were making our upcoming trip to the Bahamas all the more enticing. It was the perfect time of the year to swap out cold drizzle for abundant sunshine and 78 degree temperatures.

Everything I’d read, seen or heard about the islands made them sound ideal. I couldn’t wait to see the crystal blue water and sip a tropical drink under a nearby palm tree. But I had no idea the sounds would steal the show. No one ever told me about the flood of Bahamian delights that dance across your eardrums. So many melodic, harmonious sounds.

For instance, my wife and I could have sat on the beach all day and listened to: “Can I braid your hair?”

And: “Jet skis for rent!”

Or: “Next booze cruise leaves at 5 p.m.! You two wanna have some fun?”

We could stroll along the sand and hear them any time of the day, including: “This necklace would look great with your outfit, pretty lady.”

That one was usually reserved for my wife (I think), but who couldn’t appreciate a pitch like that?

As hard as it was to pull ourselves away from all these soothing beach tunes, we did head into downtown Nassau a couple of times and were pleasantly surprised to find that the harmonies followed us. As we walked up and down the streets, the sweet sounds of, “Beautiful Rolex watches inside – half off,” danced across the breeze.

“You should check out our handbags,” filled not only our ears, but also our hearts.

Most everywhere we went, people would walk right up to us and ask, “Carriage ride?” or “Wicker basket?” or “Pound of fudge?” It was nature at its finest.

We even got to hear: “I have a great opportunity for you guys. Hey, where are you going? I know you can hear me!”

These tropical, exotic songs were the icing on our island vacation. But at times, we missed the familiar sounds of home. That is until we visited an open market. As is often the case back home when we’re strolling through markets among large crowds during the middle of the day, we were asked rather bluntly, “Hey, you guys want some pot?”

Ahhhh, if only they put that on a “sounds you can sleep to” CD.

The only downside to the trip was the lack of sound that came when we pushed down the levers of the toilets in our hotel. But, in a twist of good fortune, that led to regular visits to the lobby restrooms of the neighboring hotel, which actually produced the sweetest sound of the whole trip, heard every time we entered the front door: “Are you enjoying the island? Great! Listen, in 30 minutes we’ll be giving a private tour of a beautiful property.”

Fantastic.

Upon returning home from a vacation, when asked what they missed most while they were gone, most people say, “my pet,” or “my bed,” or “driving my own car.” Not me. I always say, “The incessant pestering of sales people trying to sell me things every time I step outside.” But not this time.

So pack your bags and head to the Bahamas! Believe me, they have everything you need.