Introvert or Extrovert?

Like so many of the personality quizzes you have seen in publications, taken in school or taken online while killing time at work, the quiz below provides insight into whether the subject is an introvert or an extrovert. But unlike so many of them, the quiz below offers more than just two options per section, allowing the subject to make choices more befitting of their true nature.

Choose the one option from each section that most accurately describes you.

1) I am always the first to answer questions that are asked in a large social setting.
2) I usually let other people in large social settings answer questions, even if I know the answers.
3) If everyone in the group is contributing answers, then I’ll answer too so I don’t look like an idiot, but if one guy is answering everything, I’ll remain quiet and then ridicule him later with the rest of the group.

1) I work well by myself.
2) I work well in small groups or on a team.
3) I work well in small groups or on a team as long as there isn’t someone who skips out on all the meetings and then tries to take credit for a share of the work like a total douche bag.

1) If someone cuts in line, I usually bite my tongue.
2) If someone cuts in line, I usually say something to them.
3) If someone cuts in line, I usually ask my wife/girlfriend to say something to them.

1) I like to read.
2) I like to go to movies.
3) I like to read and go to movies. I don’t particularly like to read at movies, so I prefer there not be subtitles, but I’m okay with them as long as the whole movie isn’t in subtitles, like those foreign films that only come out at the end of the year. Of course sometimes those have nudity, but it’s hard to tell going in which ones will and which ones won’t. If I know for sure there won’t be nudity, then I prefer to read. Books, I mean. Or see a movie with Will Smith in it. He’s great.

1) I prefer a quiet evening at home.
2) I prefer a night on the town with friends.
3) I prefer a quiet evening at home if my friends’ plans include seeing a foreign film with subtitles that obviously won’t have nudity, and then eating at a tiny restaurant that serves what can only be described as “eclectic” food.

1) I have a lot of friends that I’m somewhat close with.
2) I have few friends, but I’m very close with all of them.
3) I’m closer to the ones that don’t always insist on eating at tiny eclectic restaurants.

1) During conversations, I usually speak the most.
2) During conversations, I prefer to listen.
3) During conversations, I’m happy not saying a word as long as the other person is telling me how impressed they are with my love-making abilities.

1) On airplanes, I like to bury my nose in a book.
2) On airplanes, I like to talk to the person next to me.
3) On airplanes, I only talk to the person next to me if they agree to recite lines from the movie Airplane.

1) I love going to parties.
2) I’m not a big fan of parties.
3) I’ll go to parties if I know that other cool people will be there.

1) At parties, I’m usually the center of attention.
2) At parties, I usually stay off to the side and watch others.
3) At parties, I hang out at the bar and drink until I say something inappropriate about or to the hosts’ wife.
4) I don’t get invited to parties.

1) I don’t mind being alone.
2) I get bored quickly when I’m alone.
3) I only get bored when I’m alone at work.
4) Actually, being alone at work is preferable to being in another self-righteous HR seminar about what constitutes appropriate behavior at the office Christmas party.

1) I am comfortable engaging in small talk with strangers.
2) I am uncomfortable engaging in small talk with strangers.
3) If the stranger and I are not on an airplane reciting lines from the movie Airplane, then I am only comfortable engaging in small talk if the bulk of our conversation consists of reciting lines from the movie Caddyshack. Otherwise, I am uncomfortable engaging in small talk with strangers.

1) I don’t mind public speaking.
2) Public speaking is my worst nightmare.
3) My worst nightmare involved my pet bunny mutating during a nuclear accident and savagely turning against me.

1) I prefer to be direct with people, even if I think I might offend them.
2) I try to avoid offending others at all costs.
3) Who wrote this ridiculous test, some pathetic psych major who’s overpaying for a useless graduate degree from a public university?

1) I have a cat.
2) I have a dog.
3) I have a cat and a dog.
4) I have appeared on the television show Hoarders because my house is so overrun with cats and dogs that I can no longer distinguish my furniture from their excrement.
5) I don’t have any pets.

Correct answers (yes, there are correct answers): 3; 1 (3 is unattainable); 3; 1; 2 (don’t be afraid to introduce some culture into your life); 2; 2 (3 is unattainable); 1 (even reciting lines from Airplane is no excuse for talking on an airplane); 3; 2; 4; 3; 3; 2 (the author has never been enrolled in graduate school); 4 is a bit worrisome, but the only unacceptable answer is 5